I had a really nice weekend, starting out with doing a Bahai stall in the centre of Darlington on Saturday morning. It was really cold and the coldest I have been in a long while but as I have sometimes said, we Baha'i's accustom our children to hardship so it is best to lead from the front as a parent and I sat and stood by my stall and enjoyed the cold. A few people were interested and I had a nice little conversation with an old lady who said I was very "hardy"! I really like it when old people talk to me as if I'm just a kid because the age gap between them and me is that between a parent and a child.

Miles is really getting his tail up with this mathematics and did not want to come to Durham with us for a walk, he preferred to study, good lad, so it was just the three of us heading out into a very misty County Durham but as we approached Shincliffe the mist lifted into a very pleasant early winter haze. We walked alongside the River Wear hoping to see Goosander's and Little Grebes but they were not there. It was very quiet with few people about because of the cold but as we walked up to Durham Cathedral it looked like it was soaring out of the misty haze and we trekked into the comfortable Cloisters and had our biscuit break there under the watchful eye of a very tiny bat on the opposite wall. It is great fun noticing the bats every week. Amazing little animals!

As we came back down the A1 there was a ground mist a few metres high in several shallow valleys on either side of the motorway as well as in riverbeds and hollows. Very magical and I'm getting to like Durham County almost as much as I like North Yorkshire and Yorkshire in general. God's country.

I really like the fact that as a family we do things on a very regular basis and this allows us to notice changes of state for one time period to the next both with each other, with our friends and the many places that we visit. New is good but seeing the familiar in a new way for me is even better.

 A very nice weekend and I have been doing some pretty extensive thinking about what I am to do with my life now because I do not have a full-time role as a househusband or home educator anymore. Get more serious about the music and kiss goodbye to family life as I know it? Get a job working with learning disabled people or as a maths teaching assistant and continue on with this great life that I have and helping people as well? Hard  to say but I am going to have to make my moves soon and I have started doing this already. I am singing and playing better than I ever have but I've also noticed that because of all the science, mathematics, life sciences and history that I get into my brain feels really sharp and understanding is easier now than it ever has been. I wish I had all of this when I was a young lad and I am glad my two young lads have got all of this now.

God bless education and the educators like Klara and Bryan Whiley, Fiona Saunders-Priem, Mr Kipling, Mr Cotgrave, Mrs Johnson in Longfield School, Linda Griffiths Fiona's colleague from Dodmire and all those people who just get other people thinking because they are crazy enthusiastic nuts about whatever they want to study in a fairly rigourous way. I think I could have blessed myself there!

Just some impressions from a Facebook article objecting to disabled people using themselves and being used as inspirational figures.

"I must admit I have never heard of Scott Hamilton. It is unclear from the article whether he is just saying what he believes to be true which is fair enough in the same way that if I believe the moon is made of cheese is true. He has the right to see it and say it  as he believes it.

 Bad attitude is a problem with anybody me included! I have my moments with that one sometimes. I have had to take to task both my lads over the  20 years that I have known them with bad attitude and how it obstructs their progress towards the goals that they wish to achieve. I can honestly say as a father it is probably the main thing that has made a big difference in terms of them getting to go where they want to.

I cannot see how the author of this article can actually know what nondisabled people think about the images of disabled people doing things even when normals do indeed say pretty ridiculous things. How many times have I expressed something in words which does not express the feelings I meant to put over and doesn't express the idea either. I'm pretty grateful for the many forgiving people around me. I made quite a blunder last night on a Facebook comment with a York female friend Sybil Wood where I had simply got the wrong end of the stick. What conclusion is she to draw from that? That at that point in time I was a total idiot! She would be absolutely right.

It has occurred to me for a while Emma that some disabled people are just like normal's who are pretty so they use their prettiness to sell themselves or are muscular and use their muscles to sell themselves and so on. Some disabled people are using their disability to sell themselves. This is all part of some disabled people acting like normals have done and is to be welcomed as dumb and sickening as it can be at times in the same way that some of the television talent shows are pretty pathetic.

Absolutely anything which I have heard said about disabled people which somebody else could comment about in a negative or positive way I have actually heard the same for people with no disability and I think it is just part of our looking at each other culture and completely drawing the wrong conclusions mostly because I don't know how somebody else really thinks even when they tell me. I am more in tune with what is going on with this Capability Assessment business rather than the psychological impressions of this article. Yet again though this article is talking about "disabled people" and the author certainly does not speak for me at all. Who is she speaking for other than herself?

On a personal note my wife has chronic sinusitis and it is a type of disability and has cost her at least five years of work which she would have done had she been healthy. Am I one of the people that Stella Young is referring to when I say to Fiona as I often do "it's great you are trying to get out and about today Fiona even though I know you are quite ill." Making an effort whether a person is disabled or not in my view is always praiseworthy."

A response to a Facebook article from a disabled person  criticising people who find disabled people inspiring.

Read the article but didn't agree with much of it . Her own view is fine but speaking about "disabled people" . She doesn't speak for me  : I do! A man crawling around the supermarket because of a legs disability  just trying to keep going is exceptional and should be admired for keeping going . I admired him in the same way I admire those soldiers I've seen  struggling over the moors carrying a  lot of weigth and following instructions, keeping it together , when they are totally knackered . Same thing in my mind  .

In my own case , just a gammy hand I can't use much,  playing the harmonica , chromatic , with a button , by essentialy punching it with my knuckles , instead of pressing it  with a finger like everyone else is also exceptional but I don't get admired for that when I do  get patted on  the head , I get it for great harmonica playing and music.

There is a correct sense in my view by the normals I encounter  that I do everything to stop my handicap limiting me and that is one way that they respect me  . I think this could be because  a lot of people I know now are 55 + and have woken up to the fact that various conditions you get with age can  make you a disabled person. The fact that I've successfully lived with it since age 6 and am getting on with life pretty well I think just gets them thinking " Well Paul manages and has a decent life so it can't be that bad " And you know it isn't !

 What normals I've known  get wrong is that they correctly admire me and others for getting on with it because they think they wouldn't cope under my disabling condition . Well they're wrong  they would and do. How do I know this ? Easy : since I've been a kid I've seen people get old and get disabling condtions and they get on with it and make the best of life .

Paralympic bunch didn't inspire me one bit can't really watch what they do in the same way I don't watch synchronised swimming . But Mo Farrel did . Awsome . Its a real test of character to win those disance events and I identify completely with that sense of keeping going because that is all I have really : persistence : by and large I never give up!

All I've just written is from my experience and doesn't speak  for anyone else . Being disabled and I've come across others who think the same, I don't want anyone speaking for me . Particularly another disabled person!

A Facebook ad to Win Her Affection? "A few tips to win a woman's affection and get her hooked on you". Ummm after 24 years of marriage I think I need to read this just in case. My good boy moves so far today are:

I've prepared a Persian Rice which is 45 min away from perfection and then served with peas and fresh sausages.
I did a 10 mile walk around York this morning and came back all fit and frisky which is the way the lass likes me.
Kept the zany humour down so it nearly exhausted Fiona but didn't actually tire her completely out.
When I forgot to help her with the shopping as she brought it in I grovelled so sincerely that even I believed it, sincerity is so important to a great and long-lasting relationship .
Convinced Fiona there will be a 50 mile wide hole in the plague of frogs and floods weather that we will be getting tomorrow where she can bask in the glorious sunshine when we go out for a walk .

What the hell else do I need to know about winning her affection?  Anyway stuff it, I think I'll be persuaded today by the "Lasting gift for wildlife" with the good old RSPB and forego the attempts to be a better man. Remember: save the birds first and your marriage later!

Moving to a green world ? Don't make me laugh. If you're into green issues read it and weep, particularly the bit about coal consumption in Europe going up! Great article and made me sit up because this is the way we humans are using energy and its not going to change for decades, going way past the dubious dates set for when global warming is irreversible and we're all going to die. If there was ever a call for a world energy policy coming from a world government its in this article. We don't need to burn all this coal folks. Nowt green about that, its just dangerous to get it and its dirty and smelly to use . There must be a better way .

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-20002801 

On Monday night accompanied by the lovely Fiona, I had a really good evening at the Singaround in the Royal Oak Butterknowle. I did not intend to play because I was feeling a bit achy from practising harmonica earlier on but the Corner Boys roped me in on a couple of songs and lent me a harmonica. The musicians were really great and entertaining and it does surprise me that considering most of us are in our late 50s and some even older than that, no names mentioned, but everyone continues to improve.

I particularly enjoyed the Corner Boys not least because for some strange reason they had a load of reverb on the PA setting and it made them sound really good in terms of sound quality. I hope they continue to do that. Great and really authentic are the Corner Boys and I hope they do a CD. Personally I would like to record them because I know I could get the tone right for their great authentic music. Lashings of reverb for that "Time out of Mind" sound that Dylan did. Just an opinion?

One of the guys I really enjoyed was Jimmy Nellis and his warbling tones really grabbed me and sent me somewhere else in much the same way that Paul Ruane does and Julie McGrath. Mr Nellis though plays very modern songs and I really like that. I look forward to hearing him again.

I did my wailing and flailing bit on the harmonica,  Fiona took a really nice carrot cake as well and Heather Cummings made her excellent meat pie. The Royal Oak chips were really good as well. Great night.

Oh yes, Button Hole Jam are really getting into vocal harmonies and that is a really good and interesting direction for them to go in.

On a day when the rain cleared up and left a blue but moody sky with clouds I could not make head nor tail of we left Fiona at home because she felt dizzy after moving some furniture this morning. So, me and the two lads headed off for the Durham Woods for the usual Saturday afternoon trek which went a lot quicker because when Fiona is not with us we walk a lot brisker.

Before setting off another one of those many and myriad amusing moments that occur in my family did actually happen. As Miles who got us alive to Durham he pulled over to park the car and when it had stopped I asked him if it was level with the pavement. He wound the window down and solemnly said "I AM STRAIGHT". Clifford and I just laughed our heads of and I said I'm not actually that bothered about his orientation Miles and we had a good giggle about this for the next 10 min. Walking, laughter and mayhem tend to go together in our family.

We went out half an hour later today 1:30 PM so we could catch the evening light on the way back and it was totally gorgeous going round on a different route cutting across from the river Wear over to the Durham Woods and then onwards by the Arboretum and into the City Centre. Biscuit break at Cloisters in Durham Cathedral was mellow and nice. When walking from the Cathedral into the town centre we discovered a new hat shop which had a multitude of seriously nice and downright funny hats and Miles tried on one of them which was a wolf's head all nicely knitted with huge ears which went down to the waist. I thought he looked quite good  but not cute because he is too full of muscles and squarejawed for that.

On the way back alongside the River Wear we saw no birds whatsoever the Little Grebes have abandoned trying to feed on that stretch of river I'm sure because the rowers from Durham University have got too much for them. Oh well there is plenty more of the River Wear for Little Grebes to go to. On the way home there were some peculiar looking clouds but I could not clearly identify what they were and when we got back Fiona was in better fettle but still a bit woozy so we just went for a crash out and cuddle together and listen to "Old Ideas" by Leonard Cohen which is totally gorgeous. As usual I insisted on putting my cold right hand upon her person but  always gets her  giggling and telling me to stop which of course encourages me even more but she seems to like it.

Another lovely afternoon out and there was good repartee between me and the boys but increasingly when Fiona does not come with us I really do miss the old girl. Hiking Ladies Rule in my view and my lovely wife is the Queen of them whether she is doing much hiking or not . it will come back I have no doubt about it she is slowly getting fitter and recovering from this sinusitis business.

An honourable mention must be made for the tea I am preparing at the moment. Instead of the usual meatballs I am making home-made hamburger with pork mince 900 g, one large onion nicely chopped and lashings of garlic and rosemary. The usual tomato sauce ,fresh pasta and garlic bread will be accompanying it. To go with the food feast we are watching  Foolsand  Horsesone of the Christmas specials "Fatal Extraction". Another day in the life of Saunders Priem family has passed by but there is still the evening to come and I have got some great Star Trek episodes to watch as well as another viewing of the BBC programme "How small is the Universe" . Great food, a lovely family and an opportunity to do some serious understanding equals paradise for me.

A response to a report on Work Capability Assessment suggested to me that I should read from a Facebook friend.

It is an excellent report describing the problems disabled people are having with Work Capability Assessment. It is interesting that no one seems to be coming forward to test the rights of claimants under the Human Rights Act. It doesn't actually say what we should be doing just criticising as a single issue political view Work Capability Assessment. Fair enough.

At no point does the report say that society has a right to know about the sick and disabled people it gives money to i.e. assess them and that the people receiving the money have a right to be assessed in the light of what they can expect from society and offer to it. In other words Work Capability Assessment and societies response to disabled people which is quite begrudging is not dealt with. The only sane response in my view from society is to provide work for all and tailor that work for those who cannot do normal work. This is also my religious (Bahai) view as well "all must work no matter how handicapped". That is true inclusivity!

What I find most interesting from a parent's perspective is that I have come across many parents over the last 20 years who have special needs children who do not have their needs met by the education system which is particularly begrudging of resources to children who need them. Work Capability Assessment in my view is just being in many respects as hard on adults as society has been on disabled and special needs children for as long as I can remember which just goes to show that the underlying problem is that we as a society just do not know how to include disabled children or adults into our society: in other words we are pretty disunified when we should have a unity between the handicapped, ill and normal people .

In many respects Gaz the whole issue is getting wrapped up with party politics and human rights which is a big mistake because it really is about a legal contract which has to exist between a disabled person and society which is immune to the various party political ups and downs, withdrawals of benefits/offering to people the benefits in order to get votes.

No government seems to wish to enter into that legal contract with a disabled child or adult in the same way that government does not wish to enter into a legal contract with a citizen that he/she will always be given work. To me that is the bedrock of any civilised society but to most people I know there is no interest whatsoever in trying to establish that foundation.  In other words what I've just mentioned has to be put on the same basis as the police , army and the general government infrastructure. Nobody is talking about that because there is party political gain or loss in appealing to or not appealing to disabled adults and children.

Just out of interest, and I say this as somebody who totally shafted Darlington Borough Council in terms of their illegal behaviour towards homeschooled children i.e. I forced them to comply with the law, it would be worth trying to find out those disabled people who do take on the Work Capability Assessment regime and when and how they actually did it. In other words it is quite likely that some people in letters and contacting a lot of other people including using any various complaints Procedures just as I did with Darlington Borough Council are getting what they want. This will be entirely consistent with a system whereby if you are rich, influential or just totally frightening in your approach to those who are trying to get you to comply to a system that does not work for you, you get what you want whether it is right or not. In other words the UK civil system bullies but individuals can bully back and get what they want. I essentially did this with Darlington Borough Council and they backed off a long way and not only that I was informed by one Chief Executive that an employee who sent an abusive e-mail to me had been "removed from the councils employment". It is all a matter of just pressing the right buttons and of course having a completely just and honest case which I did! I don't like bullies mentally or physically and I have taken on both over 50 years that I have been physically handicapped.

I would say to anybody involved with advocating for a person in Work Capability Assessment procedures or fighting it themselves: take the advice of some of the Jewish scholars in the Warsaw Ghetto in World War II: record everything. That in itself is very intimidating to people in the system so much so that some employees may claim a legal right not to talk to you particularly when you are recording what they are saying. They are quite likely not doing their job properly according to their work contract. It's nasty but then again unfortunately governments get very unreasonable and nasty with their citizens particularly local governments who just quite simply not only break the letter of the law but the spirit was well.

Work Capability Assessment  was brought in by the previous government , New Labour Gaz, it isn't a party political issue. You are fairly new to the lets shaft a cripple culture I've experienced since I was 6 . The problem isn't really to do with us disabled its mostly to do with millions of normal people who are effectively disabled by an over reliance on the market economy by tories and socialists to provide work for all when it can't and they face a very duff and uncertain future. When work is provided for all it will be pretty obvious who can and can't do it and I believe most will be able to.  The problem is to provide  work for all not assessing who can or can't work then taking benifits  away because there is a slim chance more disabled people could get work . Most normals support  Work Capability Assessment in my view because a lot of them have a pretty hard life themselves in attempting to get what they think is their right and due a normal standard of living and then struggling to get it and keep it.

Work for all : thats the way forward. Defending not wanting to work because a disabled person doesn't fit some or all of the work categories is bad for me as a cripple and bad for society. I need a job tailored around my needs not a benefit package tailored around my disabilty!

So much for oil running out . Many greeny doommongers in York in the 80s claimed it would run out by now and I never believed it . Why not . It is effectively unlimited because we will use less of it per head as we want cheaper and more efficient machines and it will be hundreds of years before we  know how much of it is in the earth so you can't put a limit on that amount . Am I pro oil and all of that ? Nope , electric cars are the way to go (oil cars are smelly and over engineered  : no high flown green arguments there!) but when anyone wants to convince me of a green future being good and even possible its best to base it on the truth and not ideological arguments because once you start making claims on fake ideas the global corporations do the same and in the car case they are currently making a lot of money selling us overengineered and over powered cars : ie they are fake selling performance few of us need. 
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-20304848

Well, it has been one of those days which corresponds to: Magic. It got off to a good start and Fiona and I did our Baha'i Stall in the centre of Darlington for a couple of hours. Only one person took a leaflet but a lot of people were looking at our stall today. They often do.

When we got back home the book I have ordered from Amazon "Gender" by Ivan Ilich had arrived which was great because that has sorted out my reading for the evening. That will be after I have watched four episodes of Star Trek Voyager! Really into Star Trek at the moment. Anyway the lads were up, they sleep in on a Saturday and we went off to Durham for a walk around the woods in the city centre. The weather was mild, blue sky with white wisps of clouds of which I could not identify because they were transitioning from one to another. Interesting and frustrating at the same time. I must read up my cloud books for carefully and I'm nearly at the stage where I can get an atmospheric science book which will be great because I will be able to see the processes occurring within the clouds. Explanation and identification equals a whole lot of satisfaction. Once I understand the explanation that is!

The low winter light really brought out the colours of the remaining decaying leaves in the woods and soon they will be all gone. When we got up to Durham Cathedral, pausing to look over the River Wear from Prebend  Bridge, there were a lot of people in military uniform preparing for the Remembrance Day Service tomorrow. It was good to see all these folk and very reassuring. I never forget that they stand between us and some of the really crazy people in the world with their professionalism and training which puts a break on some nation states trying to win their way in the world without mental acuity and commercial acumen. Brains not force is the only way forward.

Miles managed to get us to Durham in one piece with his driving and we also survived the journey back. On getting back Fiona and I headed for a crash out to listen to Stevie Wonders "Songs in the Key of Life" a wonderful CD. I am now preparing up the meatballs, spaghetti, tomato sauce and garlic bread, the lads are busy playing their games relaxing and Fiona is fast asleep. It is totally brilliant that she is getting fitter and we are planning a Swaledale walk for next week which will be great because she is an amazing Hiking Lady the finest species of womanhood known to man. She puts her boots where her mouth is. A smashing day and God bless my family and my friends, because they make life very meaningful for me.

Goodness, how I get it wrong, a few days back I mentioned about getting "River" by Ted Hughes and how I enjoyed it in the 1980s. I did read it in the 1980s but it was not the one I was enthusing about, it was a different poetry book  "Remains of Elmet" by Ted Hughes and had brilliant photographs of the Calderdale Valley in Yorkshire. Fiona and I, with Miles, walked the Calderdale Valley in the early 1990s alongside the canal and it was really brilliant in the freezing cold temperature and bright Pennine Winter light. We walked right up to the Summit Level where the Rochdale Canal starts. It was really fascinating being at the point in in the Valley at the canal watershed where the water went neither one way or the other. I think we will go back there pretty soon.

Interesting article because if I was a woman with a child or children I would like an equality of choice between getting money for childcare and keeping the money myself when I provide the childcare: that is being a housewife. I found this article of particular relevance to me having been a househusband for 20 years. There is a lovely quote by a woman, "A self-aware housewife is a rebel against the constraints of the market". This is just yet another of these tiny social and economic signs that keep cropping up that people living their lives in the way they want to without actively campaigning for or going against the prevailing social order, effect social change, because indeed they are social change: they embody it.

Over 25 years ago I read a book called "Gender" by Ivan Illich who examined these issues in the context of what a housewife does as being work and what it would cost to replace the full range of services a housewife offers. The distinction being that economic work is the only one that society values whereas social work i.e. that done by a housewife is not valued and is poorly understood in terms of its economic contribution. Interesting stuff. I am going to read Gender again.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-20222752

Fiona is getting better at last and this morning we had a really nice walk around the Durham Woods and alongside the River Wear. It was good to see her in such good fettle although she has lost some of her fitness due to a recent illness. She ran out of steam a bit when we got to the centre of Durham but a muffin and cup of coffee soon restored her. It was really good fun just sat on the steps in Durham market place, slurping and munching and watching the people go by .

She bought a hat, at my recommendation no less, which looks all studenty and has swinging tassles on it. Not bad for a retired teacher! I sometimes think we are both getting younger as we get older. It really suits her and I'm considering getting one  myself. The Little Grebes were on the River Wear again today but they kept having to dive underwater when the student rowers went flying by in their boats. Birds have to put up with a lot sometimes. A nice morning out.