This afternoon with the family I went out into the Lower Weardale Durham City outskirts for an adventurous winter walk into the centre of the city and back. I had intended to take the family up to Yad Moss in Upper Teesdale but it was way too cold for Fiona and a touch exhausting walking around the Yad Moss slopes.

Anyway, through a increasingly snowy and sombre sky we padded around the River Wear and God bless them, the Durham University students were having a boating regatta in subzero temperatures and there were about hundred young people and some oldies on the water with their coxed and non-coxed fours and twos. One young guy was sat in his boat with his shirt off and a good set of muscles bracing against the very cold wind and the snow. Brilliant, there is always one who just has to do it their way.

We saw very little bird life because the regatta crowd was taking up a fair bit of space on the River but walking up to Durham Cathedral from the West End was atmospheric and moody due to a lowering of the cloud as we approached the city. We had biscuit break in the Courtyard and after 5 min Clifford was complaining about being really cold which isn't surprising because he is very long long limbed and has a lot of muscle on him but it is all stretched out which must lose the heat a lot faster than a meso morph like Miles who seemed totally happy in it as usual. So was I, I love the cold. Then again knowing my youngest son as I do I did tell him to put on his body warmer for the walk, back at home, and he said he didn't need it and for once I allowed him to suffer the consequences of his own decision and cold he got. He's a good lad, it got even better when we got home when he was very surprised how fast I worked out 10% and 1% of some calorie comparisons we were doing between Greek yoghurt and the chocolate synthetic gunk that Fiona and Miles are having for their treat tonight. He complained that he did not understand what I was saying because I had not explained how I had arrived at the answer to which I countered with "You should understand how to do percentages in your head by now!" Oo, given his fairly good mathematics abilities it felt good saying that. I then also offered the idea that children's intelligence is often an average between one parent and the other and that when it came to percentages it looked like he was at the lower parent end. Much laughter and he is a good laugh because he can be on the receiving end of a joke as well as tell them.

Durham Cathedral was all lit up inside because it was so dark outside in spite of it being only mid afternoon but it gave the building a completely different look because most times they do not have the internal lights on and we could see all of the nooks and crannies which greatly added to the beauty of the sandstone and construction. A wonderful place, often with a quiet feeling particularly today in the winter light.

Walking back to the car we all got a bit cold in part because we were not walking at our usual pace due to Fiona still not being quite up to scratch. This persisted even when we got home and I have had to put the heating on for a whole hour in order to get the house warm. Tomato sauce and meatballs are on the way prepared by yours truly and we are having my favourite fat pasta with it which really cheeses Miles off because believe it or not he finds it hard to eat. It is just really long and chunky cylinder like pasta which I absolutely adore. A lovely afternoon out, at the back end of a good day and an evening of Star Trek and wonderful music crashing out with Fiona will follow.

Yesterday 31/1/12, my fine and beautiful mother-in-law Veronica, grandmother to our lads, peacefully passed away in Barrow in Furness General Hospital. She had been fairly ill since we last saw her a week earlier and when we saw her on Monday she had deteriorated so badly that she had lapsed into a coma but looked very peaceful.

I had known Veronica for 24 years and whilst at first she found it a bit taxing to adjust to such a rough and ready lad like me then she was quite happy to give consent to Fiona and I getting married because at the time she was a Baha'i and we require the consent of all the parents for marriage. At no point over the years did she ever lower her standards and over that time my actions and thoughts became more consistent with hers completely in line with levelling up to her way of living. She was a powerful influence on keeping our finances in order and she warmly approved of the home education that our lads received although at first she did find it difficult to accept , particularly with Miles because we had such an individualistic as well as pretty smart child. However, after she saw the amazing quality of the work that he did for a five years of age child as well as the amount of it and also his uncanny ability to be able to talk about what he was doing at length she was completely convinced. Same with Clifford.

She was a tremendously loving mother to my lovely wife and supported her wholeheartedly with her aspirations to become a headteacher as well as the change of direction when she no longer wished to do that. Our lads, Miles and Clifford always loved visiting her not least because it was always after a good hike around somewhere in the hills so they were ready for a sit down as well as a good feeding up. The times we had together in her Ripon flat were really good but when she moved to Ulverston in the South Lakes there was an even greater sense of occasion because it was such a long journey from this side of the country in the East to the West.

I am a better person for knowing her over the years and I also felt this progressed my own intellectual and social standards knowing that what I did was under her eye. It is strange that even though we had mild disagreements about various economic as well as educational issues she was always led eventually by whether the facts that occurred led to progress and prosperity or not. I grew closer to her over the years and it was amusing to see that quite often Veronica and I understood each other when talking about economic matters so perfectly whilst Fiona her daughter was completely in the dark because she does not take so much of an interest in these things. I was hoping that she would live for a few more years because I wanted her to see me doing a job other than being a househusband but I have every intention for the rest of my life living up to her high expectations and she was very pleased with how I executed being a househusband as well as taking charge of the education of the lads because Fiona was so busy earning the money with her extremely time consuming teaching job. She knew that both of the boys were brought up do the one thing which is totally vital to humanities future and that is to do what society needs as well as fulfilling their own ambitions as well. God bless Veronica and I will truly miss her.

After a very nice start to the day me and the whole family went out to the Durham Woods River Walk. The River Wear was raised up a little but the water was very clear indicating some of the snow that had occurred in the Upper Northern Pennines was melting already. Very nice and a superb backdrop to the lovely Little Grebe diving up and down amongst the reeds on the far side of the bank. The sporty Durham Students were out and about today and it was nice to see a lot of male and female freshfaced youngsters being eagerly boisterous and competing. I don't do any sport but I think it is a very good thing and over the years have offered various activities such as Judo to the boys but they never wanted to do that sort of thing they were more interested in skateboarding and hiking. Good lads!

Onward into the gorge which curves around Durham Cathedral and we had a good look at the vertical rockface which drops straight into the River Wear in only a 50 m section the other parts of the gorge have been quarried back over the centuries to provide stone for the Cathedral as well as local buildings. Very interesting. Just beneath Prebend Bridge weir there were a pair of Goosanders roosting on the water minding their own business with a bit of preening here and there but away from them was a juvenile Goosander hunting very vigourously. Must be going through a growth spurt!

Biscuit break was on our usual perch right in the centre of the Market Square underneath the statue but when we nipped over to Tesco's to get some treats for this evening Fiona's eye was caught by a gorgeous market stall full of very attractive clothing for what I would say would be young female students but the Fur Cape she saw really caught her eye and she had that eminently attractive fixed look of "I would like this please" so she tried it on and looked absolutely beautiful, very twee, and is going to wear it at the Butterknowle Open Mike night tomorrow. My wife's occasional compulsions are very attractive and she looked lovely.

Under a brightening sky walking into a milky setting sun amongst the clouds we made our way back to Shincliffe. We were quite lively today which was nice and Fiona was feeling better so when we got back and saw the latest Leonard Cohen CD plonked on our doormat we were very happy and immediately got everything in and went and crashed out to have a listen to it. It was lovely music thoughtful, mature and very musically sophisticated but in a simplistic way. That man just gets better with age and I sincerely hope that with whatever talent I have I can follow in his footsteps. A lovely afternoon out.

Well, another Saturday morning with my usual early start because I cannot sleep in, in the morning. I've done some singing practice and an hour of mathematics but I am not sure whether it is worth doing much more mathematics in the formal, practising and keeping up for teaching kids sense because the more I write and type using my remaining good hand the sorer it gets. Last week I looked up about RSI for about the thousandth time and realised that I should take care with my attempts to "cure" my problem because whether I like it or not typing and writing whilst giving me RSI over the years also seems to leave my grip a bit weaker and a certain sort of weird numbness comes into the hand as well. It restores itself usually by the next morning but it is a tiny bit worrying because I only have one good hand and arm! Absolutely nothing else gives me this problem which slightly amazes me because I am so fit being able to throw myself around a lot of miles in the hills and mountains in the North. In fact I like throwing myself around the hills!

It truly makes me wonder but the simple fact is even if I do not go and be a Mathematics Teacher there are plenty of jobs working with Mentally Handicapped people in the North East. There is even all sorts of part-time work which is understandable because most unemployed people will not be able to take it up because their benefits will cease and also most of the jobs require a car. Because of Fiona's pension I can do any job I want to part or full-time. There was one as a housekeeper for the RSPB Reserve at Saltholme on Teeside that I would quite enjoy because it is an amazing place to be and there is a good team of full-time workers, part-time and volunteers.

It is quite strange because there is a lot of unemployment and it is rising but the same jobs with mentally handicapped people keep coming up again and again and I wonder if there is a cultural and understanding barrier to working with mentally handicapped people in the North East. Right from my time working pretty much full time in Juniper Communities a home for mentally handicapped people in York from 1983 on until 1986 when I attended York University, I found working with mentally handicapped people rewarding, good fun and just downright interesting. It is strange when I think about it because if I go for one of these jobs and I think I should because I have no good reason to be in the house any more, our lads have all the skills and more that they will need to wend their way through the world and the training of them that I have to deploy now as a father is more to do with general advice and influence rather than having to be there with them. With Fiona due to retire certainly by the end of this year she can take Miles down to the RKade skate park three times a week and besides this is only going to occur for another 18 months and then he will be either working as a Secondary School teacher or doing his Ph.D. in mathematics so he can teach in a University. Good lad.

It is interesting, I like to think I can think things through and get my life more or less right which I have done pretty much since the 1980s but I find it a little bit challenging at the moment which is weird because in the 1980s I never had what I have now, a lovely wife and family and complete financial security , but this situation is more to do with living in the way that I want to within the physical constraints of my handicap, the RSI that I suffer from and just struggling to get a job like everybody else! I also have a strong desire to keep my music skills up which I have neglected to the point that my harmonica playing is declining. I started the correct practice routine yesterday of going through all 12 keys and doing jazz studies and that is the remedy and I do not have to do a lot of practice so my harmonica should keep going.

But I wonder what for? The simple fact is I cannot find anybody to play with and when I have played with some guitarists in the north-east they are just absolutely scared stiff because it goes against their sense of the guitar player always has to sound the best right? I think that is not the best foundation for becoming a really good player it is really best to just do one's best and not have some weird local personal assumption that because you are standing there with an instrument called a guitar you might be anywhere remotely near as good as the greats like Jimi Hendrix and Eric Clapton. I can play most of the stuff the top harmonica players play as well as having an original sound based on my general quirkiness! I guess I just have a different approach to a lot of the musicians that I know because I want to play with my own musical voice and something original rather than the copycat approach which I hear so often with north-east musicians.

It is a vexed question I guess which comes down to personal style and possibly explains why I don't get playing with anybody! Total respect to all musicians that I know but please don't whinge on about wanting to make it or desiring attention if you are not prepared to practice and play in an extraordinary way that captures peoples attention. One thing I liked about playing in York Irish Sessions was that there were a handful of absolutely brilliant musicians who could not care less that they were technically and musically extremely good. In many respects they were the musicians I respected the most. On the other hand at the other end of the talent pool the Button Hole Jam who love music but do not take it too seriously I absolutely love their approach and sound as well and not only that, considering their age every time I hear them they sound different, tighter and definitely on some sort of improving curve. Good stuff and it goes to show that no matter how old you are if you just love the music and are prepared to put the practice in and they certainly do you do get better. It humbles me sometimes because I am not putting in the practice at the moment and according to the good old law of "no practice no good" I am losing my skills.

Anyway, the end of public introspection. Doesn't that sound like so much twaddle! But, I feel I have clarified some things to myself and am looking forward to a great day!

Well, in winter, windblown lower Northern Pennines weather me and the family had a great little walk around the Durham Woods and the River Wear near Durham City. It was to blowy for birds today so I spent time looking at how the valley that approaches Durham City had been formed helped considerably by the reading that I had been doing last night. A netbook is really handy for doing late-night reading propped up in bed! It turns out that whilst I have been doing a lot of geology reading for quite a while it has taken getting into the geo-diversity document produced by Durham County Council to really understand what is going on with the geology in places that I walk locally. The expression "incised meander" hit me like an express train last night because I realised that river meanders such as those on the River Ouse going through York wander all over the place and have done for a long time because they are cutting through and riding over the soft movable glacial till. However, the approach of the River Wear towards and going through Durham City and beyond right down to Sunderland is an "incised meander" the difference being that after the last glacial ice retreated the River Wear cut right through the glacial till to the bedrock which made the flow go even faster and so even more cutting down and erosion took place the channel being made deeper in the process. That is why Durham Cathedral is on a promontory that has a striking resemblance to some of the same geological structures in the grand Canyon and indeed produced in exactly the same way the only difference being is that the grand Canyon looks the way it does because over about 50 million years it was raised up to about a mile above sea level so any water that fell on it would quite vigourously go trundling off any slope existing on the plateau which is what it is. Mega interesting stuff.

Fiona was feeling fit and feisty today so we walked quite briskly and biscuit break was in Durham Cathedral near the cafe alongside the quadrangle which was very pleasant. As we walked through the Cathedral the winter sun was beaming through the high West Windows and it looked transcendental and beautiful. When we walked through the town there were not many people about which was quite unusual for a Saturday . Strange to see so few students. By the end of the walk Fiona was pretty knackered so when we got back home she trundled straight off to crash out and I went into making tea mode and whilst the pasta is cooking away I'm knocking up my travel blog of the walks that I do around the area. We are having an earlier tea tonight because Fiona and I want to see a program on BBC 4 this evening about how the Amazon area of South America had a lot more people living in it several centuries ago and there is evidence of widespread farming. This blows a big hole of course in the idea that the Amazon is and has been always a pristine forest. It will be interesting to see what evidence they show for this as well as their interpretation. I should have a good evening later on reading up about this because the netbook is very handy for late-night reading when crashed out in bed!

The meatballs are nearly done. A very good day and it is nice that my beloved wife is feeling better.

Well yesterday was a good day. I did my second Teaching Observation day in a local secondary and I requested to be put in with all the tough classes and thats what they did . Very interesting and it is a good job that I have never seen teaching , in this country , as anything but a varied mixture of educationalist , social worker and policeman. I would say the policeman aspect was prominent yesterday but as always most of the kids were alright. Two of the kids got very stroppy and confrontational, and after the lesson the teacher said " I'm glad you were there, you really helped" which is nice but a real shame because no teacher should be put in the position where they are facing potential violence.This great teacher of mathematics was quite shaken afterwards. It got better in a later class where one of the young scholars had been excluded from her previous school for stabbing someone with a compass! Oh boy.

It got even better in the evening when I went up to Butterknowle to play at the Open Mike night and the welcome was as warm and friendly as ever and the music was great . All of Button Hole Jam were there and they've got even stronger in their playing so I had to be on my toes with the harmonica . Warbling with Klara Whiley with my countertenor voice was gorgeous as always and it was nice tootling with the rest of guys and Heather Dunn the keyboard player who was well on form.

We played a song of hers , a waltz and the words were lovely and very moving strapped onto a very nice melody. Good stuff . A fine lady called Heather Cummings had brought two of her brilliant pies and that was great . I asked her to show Fiona how to make such great pies and this could save our marriage because Fiona is now taking on some of the cooking . Its not so bad she knocked up the Iranian Rice last Friday and it was as good if not better than I do . She was following my recipe of course but she excelled and went beyond that. I'm being eased out of the pack useless, crippled , an old dog without a kennel!

Today Fiona was feeling well up to it so we got out to the Durham Woods's this afternoon with the lads. From the outset we had a good ongoing discussion about the role of the death penalty in our society and how death as an option is used in many walks of life for example the health service because society can just not afford to keep somebody going so will not provide the drugs to prolong life. Interesting discussion! In part, the discussion kept going because there were no birds to look at for about the first mile. We saw a couple of Goosanders keeping well away from our bank and they were well shadowed by the very low sun hanging over a faintly misty Weardale Saturday afternoon. I was amazed how low the River Wear had become as well as how clear it was.

We made our way up to the Centre of Durham to the marketplace where we go to a spot called the Perch which is where we have our biscuit break and this was a very nice stop with all the freshly faced students back and a general feeling of getting on in the low winter sunlight. On the way back crossing the Elvet Bridge we listened to an excellent busker we had heard before but his low gravelly voice is very compelling and totally authentic. His low funky blues are the real thing The Blues. Amen. Miles gave him a pound and it looked like he was doing very well which is nice because he is the real thing.

We were in very good humour today I think in part because my spirits were very buoyant from a good day yesterday and I must relate this weird experience I had yesterday on my Teaching Observation Placement because every time I was working with a female student I kept on saying "good boy", "Goodlad" even though it was a girl I was commenting on! I definitely have spent too much time with my lads and homeschooling them! The other great thing about yesterday was my youngest son Clifford, did his first Core 1 AS Mathematics exam and he went in beaming with optimism and when he got home yesterday he was still shining and he thinks he has done all right. Which he probably has going on the amount of work that he has done. Sticking with the school theme an interesting observation I made yesterday was that I knew anecdotally that the amount of work done by a homeschooled child taught in the formal way that I did it versus a State School child was about 3 to 1 and I definitely confirmed that yesterday which means that my lads when they were home educated were doing three times the amount of work per hour versus a state school child. That is quite interesting and whilst there is some justified criticism about private education it must never be taken away from the private sector that outside of the small class sizes and well resourced schools those kids do a lot more work both at school and with the homework. Doing plenty of work, as always, always pays off. Interesting stuff!

Well, when we bounced home, Fiona and I went and crashed out listening to Leonard Cohen Live in London which was absolutely amazing and I am now sat here waiting for the Pasta to soften, the meatballs to cook and the sauce is well on its way totally encouraged by the amazing Mr Joe James' fresh Rosemary picked from the gardens of South Yorkshire last summer, Joes garden in other words. This is the last of Joes Rosemary and I will be really sorry to see it go because it has totally enhanced our tomato sauce as well as Persian Rice over the last few months: thank you Joe. A very nice and beautiful day and I thank God for my wonderful family and friends. Bless you all!